Wednesday, August 28, 2013

The kindness of Strangers

Afternoon everyone.

I'll start with the news that has changed my life.  A few weeks ago my Mum started getting really tired. it got to the point where she was so exhausted that she had to go into hospital.  Numerous tests were carried out, as her liver stopped working and her kidneys were failing.  She became jaundiced as her liver was not processing any toxins and she started to get weaker and weaker.  The Doctors were stumped, but did so many tests, scans etc and they all came back negative.

On Saturday the 10th of August they did a liver biopsy to see what might be wrong.  My Mum died in Intensive care on Sunday 11th August with us all around her.  We received the results of the biopsy 3 days later, confirming that her breast cancer (that she had received the 5 year all ok for, 4 months earlier) had spread to her liver.  There were no cancer markers in her blood and nothing came back showing that this dreadful disease was back.  But she knew it was, as did we.

My Mum was so brave, and as I sit here typing this, tears are running down my cheeks, I realise just how much she cared for us all.  She knew that things weren't right, weeks before the blood tests started and she was taken into hospital.  Like all Mums they protect their family.  A rock, always there for support.  Not wanting to worry her children.

The Sunday that we spent in ICU - in the special relatives room, was so hard.  I kept having to go outside to the car park to get a mobile reception to keep my Uncle and her best friend updated. When I came back, I had a chat with the Doctor and he told me that Mum was fading fast and it wouldn't be long until she left us.

The funeral was on Thursday the 22nd August and I even managed to read a eulogy that I had written.  My voice cracked on the last word, but I think she would have been proud of me.

Everyone has been wonderful since the funeral.  The staff where we held the 'wake' (hate that word), were lovely, setting everything up for us.  Waitrose (obviously) delivered the sandwiches and I made a few little posies for the tables to cheer things up a bit.

We set up a just giving page for Cancer Research UK, as we feel that the research done gave Mum an extra 5 years with us. :0)

Mum's just giving page





I will miss her so much, but at least I was able to tell her I loved her and we were all there with her when she died.


I will be back with happier tales soon.  I promise.  However at the moment I need a bit of time to come to terms with things, look after my Dad, Brother and Milo the Wonder Dog of course!  Here is a picture of him, snoozing on the new bench in my court yard.







C x x x



17 comments:

  1. Your mum is a beautiful soul, Christian, as are you. Biggest hugs from me, you take care xxxx

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  2. Hugs Christian, we're all still here for you, and yes, your mum would have been, and still is, very proud of you.

    Leanne xx

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  3. So very sorry to hear your sad news. Your mum was very beautiful both physically and from reading your blog - in everything she did.

    I lost my mum when I was 14 and only knew her for a year - which probably sounds as though it was easier - but it isn't and I do understand what you are going through. With your family around you, I am sure that you will be such a comfort to each other - remembering the many happy times you have all shared over the years.

    x

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  4. Chirs... words fail me.... I know what you are going through having lost my Dad to a massive heart attack.. sudden but with his family with him...KIA KAHA my friend... be strong.... sending our biggest love and hugs and thoughts to you and your family... she might have pasted but live strong inside you and will still guide you in the right direction.. trust me.. LOVE ALWAYS AND ALWASY Donald and Family.. New Zealandxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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  5. So sorry for your loss

    Pattypan

    x

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  6. Christian your mum looks a beautiful lady and everything you have written about her in the past tells us she is beautiful inside too :) Treasure your memories of her, no-one can ever take those away, in time the pain will go and the happy memories will be there, be kind to yourself and let yourself grieve, and give yourself treats xx Love to you and all your family, Wendy xxx

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  7. I cry with you, wish you well and send much affection.
    Maxxx.

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  8. Its been 9 years since my mum died. Still get tearful.
    So sorry Christian, there are no words, so wont.
    cuddle Mr Milo even more, and keep talking inwardly to your mum, . Its a comfort.
    Love to you and Milo and girls
    from the depths of the Vendee
    x

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  9. Dearest Christian,
    As you know already, all the McClymont's are here for you.
    Doreen was an amazing woman who will be missed, and will be in the thoughts of so many people! Be proud, have a wee tear, on your own or with a friend;) We will all remember such a beautiful woman. Take each day as it comes, and don't worry about a thing. Sending you a big tinterweb hug.
    Lots of love to you and all the Lehmann's.
    xx

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  10. What a gorgeous looking woman - her caring just shines out of her. Reading your blog, I get the feeling there's a lot of her in you. Enjoy the memories you have of her and your family together.

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  11. Thinking of you Christian. Wottwally xx

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  12. I can't imagine your pain, Christian. What a beautiful woman. Having followed your blog for ages, I've seen what a wonderful team you and your Mum and Dad made. I've made a little donation - I can't afford much but I wanted to help in a little way. Focus on the wonderful times you had together and carry on making her proud of you. Sending you love and comfort. Suzanne xxxx

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  13. I missed all you cheery blogging on here and thought something must have kept you from us. please also take care of you - I am so sorry for your loss. Lots of happy memories.
    Susan

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  14. Oh Christian I am so sorry for you, and feel your pain. Your mum always sounded full of fun and you were obviously very close. I hope the fact that so many people are thinking of you helps a little. Look after yourself, your dad and little Milo. He will be a comfort at this time - animals always are. I lost my mum to breast cancer so I know what you are going through. Hugs - Ali (Alis girls) xx

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  15. Hi Christian, am so sorry to read this terrible news, only just seen it :( I am so sorry at your loss.

    Look after yourself xxx

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  16. I hope I speak for most of your friends. We miss your thoughts, but do not want to delve into your life at present. I am sure you will drop us a line when you are ready So just to say we are still thinking of you..me , most morning when I tend to my chicken and duck, and take my dog into the field to wee, he wont go alone as it is hunting season and is frightened at bangs..a failed beautiful Labrador.....
    xx Love to Mr Milo and girls and you
    from the depths of the Vendee

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stop me being locked up for posting to myself.....