Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Crafting is bad for your health..


Back again after a long break (from blogging, sorry)! 

Let me start with a little something I treated myself to a couple of weeks ago.  Have long been a fan of Sesame Street, no idea why, but there you go.  In particular, Elmo! So when I saw this on ebay, how could I resist??!

So, onto the Christmas fair!  It was really good and I did very well.  I will not be eating jam for the next 12 months, so that is one of the many positives!

The pictures aren't great, as I used my iphone, but you get the idea!

My chocolate snowmen did really well, just posted 4 off to Denmark! 

 I only made 12 mini Christmas cakes this year and sold them all! Should have made more, but will remember for next year!

 Since I can remember, I would visit a Christmas market every year when seeing my Gran and Family in Germany.  One thing they all have in common is sugared almonds.  Always wrapped in paper cones and always delish!  I stumbled upon a recipe and gave it a twirl.  20 minutes the recipe said.  They lied.  After sweating for 45, not able to leave the pan for fear of burning the sugary almonds, I started stripping off.  Easier said that done, when you have to keep stirring!

Stanley the Rayburn did a good job, but gets so hot!  I ended up in a tshirt and pants, - a nice mental image for you all there, just as the familiar smell hit me! Perfect almonds, cinnamon and vanilla, brought back wonderful memories.  I even found instructions on making the paper cones.

Talking of Stanley, I have sussed out how to use the hob part now.  Pans are no problem, but after 13 months and a couple of over-cooked-but-raw-in-the-middle cakes (and a wonderful vanilla and sultana cake burning as I type) I simply cannot work out the main oven!  It is driving me mad.  Seeing as the Rayburn is on now for the winter, it makes sense to use it for cooking, as well as heating the house, but I can't seem to cook anything in the oven.  The temperature gauge is wrong, so I tweak the controls and guesstimate the cooking times, but it is dreadful!

I have 2 more Christmas puddings, 5 bags of pistachio fudge and 2 jars of sparkly cranberry jam to deliver and then I am done!  Today was spent 'Postman Pat' style sorting out parcels to send.  
These are the wrapped puds, simple, but country.  I like the look. Very me. 

I had to go into Town today.  Ran out of brown parcel paper!  I know, so unlike me.  Anyway, after dodging 3 'could you spare 7 hours to answer a few questions'? type people, I was nearly run down by a clinically obese man in a motorised scooter.  Followed by his huge wife and colossal daughter.  Possibly  a deal at the mobility shop, 3 for 2?  Must be hereditary I thought. Until I saw them blockading McDonalds and the staff in a frenzy!   

People milling around Poundland asking how much is this?? Spending their dole money in Ladbrookes.  I really hate going into Town.  

Now, may I be candid?  Apologies to my Mum who will read this and anyone of a nervous disposition, but I have to get something off my chest.

I went to the Doctors today.  It seems I have a mild kidney/bladder infection, 'probably caused by not drinking enough'.  Apparently, tea doesn't count.  Even though it is 3 weeks and 4 days since my last diet coke, I need to drink more water.  Now, infections of this delicate nature (and bloody pain in my lower back) are not that common in men.  So, my Doctor suggested I visit the local GUM clinic - Google it, I do not wish to go into details here.....

I was given antibiotics and a covering letter which went as follows -

Dear Colleague,

Christian a 38 year old AIRLINE STEWARD, appears to be suffering from duyeyvgagvchjavhcdwcvgvitis (I seriously cannot read it).  Please could you conduct a full screen.

Now, firstly, I am 31 and a few months, cough, and secondly, what has my job got to do with anything??  Would he write 'a 38 year old cashier in Waitrose'???  What exactly is he implying?  I am a flying mattress???

We had a long discussion about my sex life.  Well, I'll be honest, we talked about the hens, my 'new dog', oh and how cold it was outside, for longer.  The sex life talk was along these lines....

Doctor - 'so, when was the last time you were sexually active'?

Me - 'erm.....'

Doctor - 'Just a rough idea'?

Me - 'I can give you the decade....'

So what exactly am I going to the GUM clinic for??

Not only do I have to live with the shame of having to visit the 'clap clinic' but I need to ask them how Quilting, dog walking and jam making could possibly lead to an STI?

A friend said they deal with people's waterworks as well as 'infections down there'.  Very reassuring.

On to a more festive, and less embarrassing, topic - you see how I give everything to my loyal readers??  Read it now, while you get a chance, I might delete this post tomorrow, when the effects of the pistachio fudge have worn off - I have put up my outside lights at Bramble Cottage!  The neighbours haven't, but I don't care.  I will force the Festive season on all!  They are on a timer, so I can spread Christmas joy when I am away with work.

Tomorrow is operation Christmas.  The house needs a sprinkling of festiveness, so the garlands, baubles and lights will be coming out (and promptly put away if Milo takes a shine to them...

I am seriously behind with my Christmas shopping.  Nearly done, but it is the 11th and I haven't wrapped a single present.  The cards were posted today - one tip, don't put your cards for your neighbours in the pile of cards to be posted.  Yes, I did post cards titled 'Sue and Dudley' and 'Colin and Jo' with no addresses.  Didn't even see the point in asking the postman to give them back when he opened the box. It is against the Holy Postal vow......

Milo has been a joy!  I took him for a really long walk yesterday and he came back every time I whistled!  Progress.  I won't ever stop him chasing rabbits, deer or crows, but that is terriers for you.  I was so proud of him. Gave him extra treats and cuddles!

Today, he bloody well ignored me.

A frosty morning shot - he is just like me and hates having his pictures taken.

I will leave you now but will be back soon!  Back to work on Friday - all day in Frankfurt to visit the Christmas market, then Glasgow for the night and some awful standby and then a couple of weeks off - all over Christmas!!

C x x x


  1. Fab post! Worth the wait. Any chance of the recipe for sugared almonds, here or elsewhere ;-)

  2. oh dear! dont ever apologise for being hoinest.. it makes you you Christian.

    hugs, Leanne x

  3. hugs from me too, looking forward to the snowmen travelling over to DK,they will be at home with the snow but quickly eaten and enjoyed too.


  4. As always a FANTASTIC blog that made me laugh out loud (not something I have done in the last week.
    good luck at the clap clinic my darling boy.....
    keep the blogs coming - I have no Christmas here as Paul is too busy working, cooking, cleaning, washing, looking after all the animals & me to do the tree and decorations.......
    you are my very own Christmas fairy xxxx

  5. Dont worry Christian your Doc is just being over cautious. in men infections in urine can back track to kidneys etc so be pleased hes being so vigilant. cranberry juice is good - bloody sour so can try tablets instead. And they also put on my ref letters "this 50 yr old nurse" - which annoys me as whoever I see thinks I know what they are blathering on about. Often I dont as its not my speciallity. I think Doctors like to pigeon hole their pts. get well soon. Ali


stop me being locked up for posting to myself.....